Stress and Anxiety: What Is Your Body Trying to Tell You?

Have you ever found yourself experiencing the physical symptoms of stress or anxiety?

Perhaps your shoulders become tense, your breathing changes, your heart starts beating faster or you get that uncomfortable feeling in the pit of your stomach.

But here's something I'd like you to consider.

As you read those opening sentences, did you notice anything happening in your own body?

Perhaps nothing at all. Or perhaps you became aware of your breathing, some tension in your shoulders or a sensation you hadn't noticed a moment earlier.

How often do you actually notice what's happening in your body when you're becoming stressed or anxious? Do you recognise the signs as they're developing, or is it only afterwards that you realise how overwhelmed you've been feeling?

Stress and anxiety are experiences most of us will encounter in one form or another. And in a world where we're increasingly digitally connected, it can sometimes feel as though there's very little opportunity to switch off. Work emails, messages, social media, the news and the everyday demands of life can all compete for our attention.

But what is actually happening to us when we experience stress or anxiety?

What's the difference between stress and anxiety?

Although we often use the words interchangeably, stress and anxiety aren't quite the same thing.

Stress is generally our response to a demand or pressure we're experiencing. It might be a difficult day at work, an approaching deadline, financial worries or an argument with someone close to us.

Anxiety is more closely associated with anticipating something that might happen. We may be worrying about a future conversation, imagining something going wrong or feeling threatened without being entirely sure why.

Of course, the two can overlap. A stressful situation can leave us feeling anxious, and ongoing anxiety can itself become stressful.

And importantly, neither stress nor anxiety is automatically a bad thing.

A certain amount of stress can help us focus, respond to challenges and get things done. Anxiety can alert us to possible dangers and encourage us to prepare for situations that matter to us.

Think about preparing for an interview, giving a presentation or taking part in a sporting event. That increase in alertness might actually help you perform.

The difficulty often comes when these responses become prolonged, overwhelming or start affecting how we live our lives.

Are we becoming more stressed and anxious?

It can sometimes feel as though stress and anxiety are becoming an increasingly familiar part of everyday life.

We're more digitally connected than ever. Work emails can reach us outside working hours, our phones constantly demand attention, and news and social media can expose us to things that leave us feeling worried or overwhelmed.

Of course, being digitally connected isn't necessarily a bad thing. But I do wonder how often we genuinely give ourselves an opportunity to switch off.

And the research suggests that mental health difficulties involving anxiety and depression have become more common.

According to NHS England's Adult Psychiatric Morbidity Survey, the proportion of adults aged 16–64 experiencing a common mental health condition increased from 18.9% in 2014 to 22.6% in 2023/24.

The survey also found that 24.2% of women and 15.4% of men across the adult population were experiencing a common mental health condition.

These figures cover conditions including anxiety disorders and depression, rather than everyday experiences of stress alone.

Work-related stress is another significant issue. The Health and Safety Executive estimated that 964,000 workers in Great Britain experienced work-related stress, depression or anxiety in 2024/25, accounting for approximately 22.1 million working days lost.

What's interesting to me is that these figures represent more than numbers. Behind them are people trying to manage their working lives, relationships, responsibilities and the demands placed upon them.

And although women report higher levels of anxiety and common mental health difficulties in population surveys, that doesn't mean men aren't struggling. We also need to be curious about how people recognise, communicate and seek support for their experiences.

Perhaps the question isn't simply whether we're becoming more stressed or anxious, but whether we're recognising what's happening to us and finding ways to support ourselves before things become overwhelming.

What's happening in our brain and body?

Our brains and bodies have developed ways of responding to potential threats.

When we perceive something as dangerous or threatening, brain networks involved in detecting danger, including the amygdala, can help activate our stress response.

The sympathetic nervous system prepares us to respond. Our heart rate may increase, breathing can become faster, muscles tense and stress hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol are released.

You may have heard this described as the fight-or-flight response. We can also experience freezing or becoming immobilised when overwhelmed.

Sometimes people explain this using the example of our ancestors encountering a dangerous animal. Their bodies needed to respond quickly rather than spend time carefully thinking through every possibility.

That basic protective response remains part of us today.

The difference is that many of the situations we experience as threatening aren't physically dangerous.

An approaching deadline, conflict with a partner, criticism from a manager or even the anticipation of a difficult conversation can activate some of those same bodily responses.

Our nervous system responds not only to physical danger but also to how we interpret and experience situations.

When we're highly anxious or stressed, we may also find it harder to concentrate, think flexibly or make decisions. The brain systems involved in attention and reasoning can work less effectively under intense stress.

I sometimes describe this as my brain not quite being online.

It doesn't mean we've stopped thinking. Rather, our attention can become increasingly focused on the perceived threat, making it harder to step back and consider other possibilities.

And this is where paying attention to our bodies can become particularly useful.

Learning to recognise your own signs

When I think about how I experience stress, I can recognise certain patterns in myself.

I might become more irritable, find myself rushing or notice that my breathing has changed. I also have little physical tells, such as scratching my head, which I've come to recognise can sometimes accompany feeling stressed.

With anxiety, I might experience that nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach. My thinking can become less clear, and I can find myself becoming increasingly focused on whatever is worrying me.

These aren't necessarily things I consciously decide to do. They're responses I can become aware of.

And everybody's experience will be different.

You might notice yourself clenching your jaw, holding your breath, becoming restless, withdrawing from people or finding it difficult to sit still.

Sometimes we notice these physical changes before we've consciously put words to what we're feeling.

Other times, we might recognise the thoughts first.

The important thing isn't getting it right. It's beginning to notice.

You might even ask yourself now:

What happens in my body when I feel under pressure?

Do I recognise the early signs, or do I only notice when things have become overwhelming?

What do I tend to do when I feel stressed or anxious?

We can't avoid everything that makes us anxious

There are some situations we can choose not to put ourselves through.

If rollercoasters make you anxious, you don't have to go on one. The same applies to skydiving.

But life isn't made up entirely of dramatic situations.

Sometimes it's the everyday experiences that affect us most.

Work pressures, relationships, financial responsibilities, family expectations, difficult conversations or simply feeling that there aren't enough hours in the day.

We can't always remove those situations from our lives, and avoiding everything that makes us uncomfortable isn't necessarily helpful either.

In fact, sometimes avoidance can provide immediate relief while reinforcing the belief that a particular situation is something we cannot manage.

That doesn't mean we should force ourselves into situations that are genuinely unsafe or overwhelming.

Rather, I think there's something valuable in becoming curious about why particular experiences affect us in the way they do.

Why does criticism from one person affect us more than criticism from somebody else?

Why might a difficult conversation leave us feeling anxious for days beforehand?

Why do some of us become angry under pressure while others withdraw or try to keep everybody happy?

Often, our responses make more sense when we begin to understand the experiences and patterns behind them.

How might Gestalt psychotherapy help?

As a Gestalt psychotherapist, I'm interested in your story and the experiences that have shaped you, but also in what's happening for you in the present.

That includes your thoughts, feelings and bodily experiences.

We might begin by exploring a situation that's been causing you stress or anxiety.

As you talk about it, I might notice that your breathing changes, you become quieter or you begin speaking more quickly.

I may invite you to slow down and notice what's happening.

Perhaps you're aware of tension in your chest, a feeling in your stomach or an urge to move away from something uncomfortable.

We wouldn't automatically assume what those sensations mean. Instead, we could become curious about them together.

Sometimes that awareness can help us recognise patterns that have become so familiar we barely notice them.

For example, perhaps you find yourself becoming anxious whenever you think somebody is disappointed in you.

As we explore that experience, you might begin to recognise a familiar need to please others, avoid conflict or prevent rejection.

These patterns don't necessarily appear out of nowhere.

They may have developed at a time when they helped us manage difficult experiences or relationships.

Our minds and bodies can become very good at protecting us, even when those protective responses are no longer helping us in the present.

Therapy isn't about criticising those responses or forcing them to disappear.

It's about understanding how they've developed, what purpose they might serve and whether there are other ways of responding.

Building support rather than simply pushing through

Another important part of Gestalt therapy is recognising the support we have available to us.

Sometimes when people think about coping with stress or anxiety, they focus entirely on what they need to do differently.

But support isn't only about finding something within ourselves.

We can think about it in three ways.

Support within ourselves

This might include recognising our feelings, noticing our breathing, understanding our limits, developing self-compassion or remembering times when we've managed difficult situations before.

Support from other people

This could be a partner, friend, family member, colleague or therapist. Sometimes being able to talk openly with somebody, ask for help or feel understood can make a significant difference.

Support from our environment

Our surroundings and circumstances matter too. Having time to rest, setting boundaries around work, taking breaks from constant digital demands, moving our bodies or creating a more manageable routine can all contribute to how supported we feel.

Not everybody has equal access to these forms of support, and sometimes the pressures we're facing need practical changes rather than simply a different way of thinking.

In therapy, we can explore what support is already available, what might be missing and how you might begin to develop more of it.

As that support grows, it may become easier to approach situations that previously felt overwhelming.

We can also begin to challenge familiar patterns, gradually and at a pace that feels manageable, rather than simply repeating the same protective responses.

Coming back to the body

I'd like to return to the question I asked at the beginning.

What did you notice in your body as you read this article?

Perhaps you've become more aware of your breathing, your posture or some tension you hadn't noticed before.

Or perhaps you haven't noticed anything in particular. That's okay too.

The point isn't to constantly monitor yourself or become anxious about every sensation.

It's about developing a little more awareness of how you experience stress and anxiety, recognising your own patterns and becoming curious about what those experiences might be telling you.

Stress and anxiety are part of being human.

We may not always be able to prevent them, but we can begin to understand our relationship with them and develop more choice in how we respond.

And sometimes that begins with something as simple as noticing what's happening in our bodies.

Thinking about therapy?

I offer Gestalt psychotherapy and counselling in Croydon, Peckham and online.

If stress or anxiety is affecting your life, therapy can offer a space to explore what's happening for you, understand your patterns and consider what support you might need.

I offer a free 20-minute initial consultation where we can talk about what brings you to therapy and whether working together feels right.

Shane Joshua — UKCP Registered Psychotherapist and BACP Registered Counsellor

£85 per 50-minute session | Croydon, Peckham & Online